It’s 2005

My ’84 Chevy Caprice—a great big V6, 3.8 L, dented, gray upholstered floating sofa
Dies unexpectedly

I phone my brother in Jersey
He says he has a ’95 Toyota Camry with only 44,000 miles
He’ll give me for a great deal
The only problem is I have to fly back east to pick it up

So I find a cheap ticket, grab a flight out of LAX
Fifteen hours later, I’ve already tossed back a few beers with bro
Exchanged smiles, hugs, money
Grabbed a nap and have headed out in my new car




Hey everyone, guess what?

I’ve got my period.