GLORIA HARRISON is the facilitator for the TNB Book Club, the lead editor for The Portland Red Guide: Sites & Stories of Our Radical Past by Michael Munk, a contributing editor to Pete Anthony’s book, Immaculate, and the mother of awesomely-named twin boys.


She went through a phase where she cut off her hair, stopped looking at mirrors, and abstained from both sex and Facebook.  (She still abstains from Facebook, although she occasionally hooks up with Twitter.)  We think this was brought on by her mourning the death of Gary Coleman.


She once bought a car while she was in labor, giving new meaning to the term hysterical pregnancy.


As Eliot measured life in coffee spoons, she uses Harry Potter book and movie releases.


By sheer force of will, she escaped the ravages of meth (and also, the ravages of New Mexico).


She’s interviewed some cool people: Storm LargeDennis McCartyScott Mosier…and Storm Large again.


And yes, those are real.

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50 responses to “Featuring…Gloria Harrison”

  1. Irene Zion says:

    Gloria Harrison is a delight in every way.
    She’s fun to read and always has something interesting to say.
    Everyone likes Gloria!

    • Gloria says:

      Aw, Irene. You’re a delight in every way. I’m not sure everyone likes me – I could provide a list. 🙂 But I’m glad you do, since I think you’re so wonderful. XO

  2. Tawni Freeland says:

    Woo-hoo! We love us some Gloria. (:

  3. I think I’ve told Gloria this, but she was the first TNB writer I’d read when I came across this site — which made for a terrific first impression. And working on the Tron piece w/ lady G was an absolute blast!

    Yay Gloria!

    • Gloria says:

      Henceforth, I would appreciate if you would refer to me only as Lady G. I’ll make sure that everywhere I go, I’m in an egg carried by slaves wearing gold lamé.

  4. Finally! Gloria getting the bandwidth she deserves. Next stop, an all-Harrison banner running across the top of the site for weeks on end! CC’ing Brad right now.

    • D.R. Haney says:

      Too late. Already did it.

      • Gloria says:

        Well, I would be in good company up there with you, Duke. I could give Brad some of the photos from my own accident, which look similar to the one of you that’s scrolling up there. We could have a whole “Hit and Run” themed week. 🙂

        • D.R. Haney says:

          Was your accident a hit-and-run? Mine wasn’t, technically. The driver stopped, though I only remember seeing him for an instant, and not very well. I was, you know, preoccupied with bleeding and destroyed bones and stuff.

      • Gloria says:

        No, it wasn’t a hit and run. I just like the idea of a Hit-and-Run themed week. We could do a lot with that. I think theme week would be fun.

        The man who hit my foster family’s van had a .28 blood alcohol level and couldn’t have run anywhere, should he have lived, which he didn’t. His truck exploded upon impact and he and his passenger died, though the impact may have killed them. I’ll never know. My foster mom died, too. I was behind her, unseatbelted, and I crashed into her seat as it came smashing back into me and then I got pinned (via my left leg) under her seat and next to the side of the van, which folded onto me. I don’t remember squat. They wrenched me out with the Jaws of Life and then Medivacced me to Loma Linda Medical University. Everything I know about that day from a half hour before to three days later when I woke up in ICU has been learned from police and medical reports.

        Have you written about your accident? I don’t recall – was the driver charged? Did you ever face him? How long were you in the hospital? I apologize if this is personal info I’m fishing for.

        XO
        G

        • D.R. Haney says:

          The driver wasn’t charged, no. I only saw him once, at the scene of the accident, but I didn’t get a good look at him. I was in the hospital for six weeks, and the case never went to trial. I’ve never written about it at length; I’ve never found a way to do it. But I do intend, eventually, to find a way.

          It’s not intensely personal information, but I suppose, because I do want to write about it one day, I’m a little guarded about it nonetheless.

      • Gloria says:

        What a nightmare. Sorry to hear you had to deal with all that – and with no recompense to boot. I’ve not written about mine either. I mean, sure, I mention it all the damn time, but that’s hardly the same thing. I’ve approached it in the manuscript I’m working on, but I feel like it’s the type of thing I want to get just right – as much as possible, I guess.

        Cheers.

        • D.R. Haney says:

          I did receive some money, but not as much as I’d hoped to get. The police reports were against me, but even so, the driver’s insurance company was afraid a judge or jury might feel sorry for me, so they gave a lowball figure, which my lawyer said I should I take. Then I had to fight for the money with my own insurers, who said I owed them for my hospital bill. I told them I didn’t care if the money sat there forever; I would never sign it over to them. Eventually they backed down, and then the most of the money — what my lawyer didn’t take and I didn’t owe to my doctors (the hospital bill was all supposed to be paid by my insurers) — was almost all swallowed up anyway by student loans.

          A life-changing accident is definitely something you want to get right in writing. I mean, you want to get everything right, but this especially. My own problem is that I can’t find a way to write about it that wouldn’t be, simply, “This is what happened to me.” That’s not enough for an essay, and I’ve already made use of the accident in fiction, though the version there was significantly altered. But eventually I’ll figure out how to approach it in nonfiction. It’s only a matter of waiting for the inspiration.

    • Gloria says:

      Heh. Thanks, Sean.

  5. Lisa Rae Cunningham says:

    Gloria. My fava-flava. Right on, sister.

    • Lisa Rae Cunningham says:

      I beg your pardon. Lady G.

      • Gloria says:

        I liked it better when you called me Glo-Worm, ’cause that’s just adorable. I wouldn’t really want to be carried around in an egg by slaves. I don’t have to be Lady G. Also, I should watch what I ask for. One time, I called T-Mobile for something or another, and the lady answered with something like, “It’s a great day at T-Mobile! Can please ask who I’m talking to?!” I replied, “Gloria Harrison.” She chirped, “Wonderful! Is it okay if I call you Gloria?!” And, because I’m hilarious, I said, “No. Would you please call me Princess?” And so, for the rest of the long, grueling call, she called me Princess. I had to ask her to stop. It was insufferable.

        Hi LRC!

        • Lisa Rae Cunningham says:

          I have a funny story to tell you, Glo-worm. Spin-off on the Princess chat, but I’ll have to hit you up behind the scenes. Don’t get too excited. It’s a lukewarm story. And at my current rate of email/internet efficiency, I should get to it by 2013. Hopefully ya’ll don’t kick me outta here for lame participation. The only current uses I have for electricity are lightbulbs and a guitar.

          I only emerge for Princess Glo-worm tributes.

      • Gloria says:

        I’m pretty sure you can’t get kicked out, LRC. It’s like Hotel California. You can check out any time you like…

        Email me the story when you have a sec. 🙂

  6. Jessica Blau says:

    LOVE all of Gloria’s posts! She is a GREAT presence on TNB!

  7. Joe Daly says:

    That’s what I’m talking about! Congrats, Gloria! A richly deserved tribute to one of my fave contributors. Rock on, sister…

  8. Ashley Menchaca (N.O.Lady) says:

    YAY!! Gloria!!
    Love you!

  9. G-L-O-R-I-A!!
    It had to be youuuuu – it had to be youuuuuu.
    I looked around and suddenly found, Gloria, youuuUUUuu!
    Yay, you!

  10. Zara Potts says:

    Awww Steph – you stole my line!
    Never mind – I’m gonna repeat it:
    G…L…O..R..I yi yi yi yi yi…A
    Nice to see you here!
    X

    • Gloria says:

      Ha! Zara – I especially appreciate you doing the “yi yi yi yi yi” part. You’ve no idea how many people miss that detail. 🙂

  11. James D. Irwin says:

    Gloria!

    Gloria is awesome.

    You know, proper, full on, Batman-level awesome.

    • Gloria says:

      If only being as cool as Batman meant I automatically was entitled to his car and other gadgets. Hi, sweet Irwin.

  12. Gloria! Gloria! Gloria! Go Gloria!

  13. Becky Palapala says:

    Dude! It’s you!

    • Gloria says:

      It’s totally me. Although I have hair now. I feel like I need new pictures, but that’s hard when I’m the one holding the camera all the time.

  14. Richard Cox says:

    It’s Gloria! Hey, you!

  15. Matt says:

    Totally pimped this out on Twitter.

  16. Uche Ogbuji says:

    I feel bad that I haven’t had time lately to be the herald of the cool TNBer-of-the-week features, and just as bad that I haven’t much of a chance to play social media scrabble with you, Gloria.

    But I do without a doubt have time to say that “Let’s See How Fast This Baby Will Go” is one of the all time TNB classics. Heck, it’s one of the all time classics, period.

    • Gloria says:

      Thanks for saying so, Uche. I appreciate it. (And I hope whatever’s been taking up your time is full of satisfaction and boo-ya! moments. [Does anyone still say boo-ya anymore?])

  17. sheree says:

    You cannot possibly know how damn thrilled I am to read on your bio here at TNB that you are writing a book! I read the above post and thought to myself: Holy hell I hope this lady has a book in print! I kept clicking on your name until I found your bio and yippppeeeee!

    Looking forward to reading you in the future.

  18. Dillon Rodgers says:

    i would have never to believe that someone has the same spelling of my name like dillon. i wish i could meet him someday

  19. Erika Rae says:

    So cool to see you featured up here, Gloria. Oh – and I dig your new gravatar. ( : So very awesome.

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