Do the Kings of Leon hate you?

They don’t hate Derrick Brown, they hate my alter ego, Dr.Carlos Mandible. A big “how do ya do” broke out when I wanted to play a small electronic party in Nashville on a Monday night for about ten people. (Kings of Leon are from near Nashville.) I didn’t want my pal to know I would be in town so I leaked clues about my band, The Spring Hill Spider Party, to the club.  Dr. Carlos Mandible is the lead singer. Clues like, the secret band playing on Monday night hates Kings of Leon and used to hate Amy Grant, this band has a drummer who dresses like Merlin, etc. Instead of ten people being there when I showed up, there were 350 due to some insane postulating and himming and hawing that the mystery band was to be Kings of Leon. Next month we will hate Rascal Flatts. People in the audience wanted to kill me. I got boo’ed for 30 minutes straight. It was a real test of wills.

Where do you write?

Often times on my boat, the sea section, where I live. I used to drink and write. My body got pissed and I can’t anymore. I can’t write mid day.

What’s the most dangerous thing about Derrick Brown?

That’s a weird question.

Your job is to answer these questions, not judge.

But I don’t even know what you mean.

Do your job.  Speaking of jobs, what is the job of writers?

Hmmm. I think to lure in the audience without spelling out what is to…

Next question:  How do you release inspiration?

Are you going to interrupt me?


I get inspired by taking motorcycle trips. I get inspired by sitting in the back of the room.

What offends you?

Flip flops. Open-toed shoe night.  Shirts with too many graphics happening. The word affliction. Ed Hardy. Lady Gaga. Horrible Pastors. River rats. People who text while they’re talking to you. People who are on their phones, checking it all the time.

Sorry, I have to take this.



DERRICK C. BROWN is s a poet, novelist, comedian and storyteller. He is the winner of the 2013 Texas Book of The Year award for Poetry. He is a former Paratrooper for the 82nd Airborne and is the president of one of what Forbes and Filter Magazine call “…one of the best independent poetry presses in the country,” Write Bloody Publishing, which has launched over 130 books of poetry. He is the author of seven books of poetry and three children’s books. The New York Times calls his work, “…a rekindling of faith in the weird, hilarious, shocking, beautiful power of words.” He is from Los Angeles, California.

5 responses to “Derrick Brown: The TNB Self-Interview”

  1. You’re a witty one. I’m going to find this book and read it.

    Dr. Carlos Mandible. Awesome.

  2. Great to have you aboard, Derrick. Onward and upward, my friend.

  3. Zara Potts says:

    Welcome to TNB! I promise not to text while reading your work..

  4. Hieronymous Bunting says:

    This interview is le’garbage. Did the interviewer even know to whom he/she was speaking? This is half-hearted, witless journalism that is borderline offensive in its tomfoolery. My senses are insulted by this and I intend to tell an editor or some other sack with a false air of import. Or my name’s not Hieronymous Bunting! Kings of Leon do suck though.

    • derrick brown says:

      thank you hieronymous

      i say sack this journalist indeed

      these self interviews are doomed if not performed with verve and gusto by a qualified self.

      the public demands it!

      derrick brown

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