I’m a big fan of SMITH Magazine’s 6-Word Memoirs. So much so, I often find myself encapsulating everyday events both large and small into six-word sound bytes without even being aware of it.
For those of you in the dark about 6WMs, Ernest Hemingway once wrote a story in six words (For Sale. Baby Shoes. Never Worn.) and is said to have called it his best work. SMITH has taken this idea and marathoned with it.
With the Oscars just two weeks away (Feb 22nd), some of you may be finding it difficult, in these trying economic times, to fork out the $12.50 on a single movie ticket. So I present, for your consideration, a condensed review of each of the major* nominees.
All in just six simple words.
“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”
The title’s conveniently six words long.
Interview that should have failed, succeeded.
Got to 40, but not 50.
May-December romance: Audiobook coming soon.
Survives shit creek without a paddle.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
David Fincher, “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”
‘Seven’?Yes. ‘Fight Club’? Absolutely.Button?
Ron Howard , “Frost/Nixon”
So much better than ‘DaVinci Code’.
Gus Van Sant , “Milk”
Milking it for all it’s worth.
Stephen Daldry , “The Reader”
See it and weep. I did.
Danny Boyle , “Slumdog Millionaire”
The feel-good ‘Trainspotting’ of 2009.
BEST ANIMATED FEATURE
John Travolta and Miley Cyrus.Seriously?
“Kung Fu Panda”
Merely a P.C. Hong Kong Phooey.
Future’s plight: you oughta wear shades.
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
“The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” Screenplay by Eric Roth, Screen story by Eric Roth and Robin Swicord
F. Scott’s spinning in his grave.
“Doubt” Written by John Patrick Shanley
I gave up Catholicism for Lent.
“Frost/Nixon” Screenplay by Peter Morgan
Watergate was least of his worries.
“The Reader” Screenplay by David Hare
Illiteracy is not a Jewish problem.
“Slumdog Millionaire” Screenplay by Simon Beaufoy
Is that your final answer, chaiwala?
BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
“Frozen River” Written by Courtney Hunt
Baby In Duffle Bag: On Ice!
“Happy-Go-Lucky” Written by Mike Leigh
Enraha. ENraha. EnRAha. EnraHA. ENraHA! ENRAHA!!!!!!!!
“In Bruges” Written by Martin McDonagh
More fun than wafles and dinges.
“Milk” Written by Dustin Lance Black
Just another day at the biopic.
“WALL-E” Screenplay by Andrew Stanton, Jim Reardon, Original story by Andrew Stanton, Pete Docter
Should have been nominated: Best Feature.
* * * * *
*All apologies to the short filmmakers, documentarians, make-up artists, costume, production and sound designers and editors and all the rest of my fellow BTL homies.Seriously and from the bottom of my heart, I promise, I DO stay for every single last credit and I KNOW how major the role is that you play in the process.xo ~k