Find the angry dog

The dying houseplant
The noncommittal monosyllabic babbling idiots having a tailgate party
In your first chakra

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Find the night clerk at the home for the terminally confused
The 50-pound bag of fertilizer used for the garden instead of a bomb

Find St. Jude, Hey Jude
The man with pentagram hands
The woman whose kisses are weapons of bliss

Find the black cat crossing your path
The heart attack and scoliosis’d back

The dog-eared bible
And virulent virus
The Band-Aid big enough for a fucked up life

Find, find, find them all and they’ll say…

Find the strangled alarm clock
The soul’s X-ray machine
The songbird with laryngitis
The rosebud with a bellyache

The chicken that shot himself by the side of the road
When he finally realized that crossing that road
For so many years just wasn’t funny anymore

Find the heavily medicated butterfly chaser
The belly dancing Jell-o and dying buffalo

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Find the drug addict, turned sex addict, turned food addict, turned gym addict

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Find the homeless man consumed by a plague of peace
The body bag and busted shopping bag
Find the once huge heart now turned into a tiny nest of tears

Find, find, find them all and they’ll say…

Find the holy temple
The gun pressed to your temple

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Find the Double Bubble, double trouble, bubble in the bloodstream
Find the hanging party and garden party
The deathbed prayer and crystal stair

The clock that strikes the hour of rage again and again
Find the most wished upon star

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Find the joy deflator hooked up to a remotivator
The riverdancing Jesus and hula-hooping Buddha
The lotus flower Happy Hour

The millions of wallflower angels unable to dance on the head of a pin
But still having a kick-ass time at the party

Find, find, find them all and they’ll say…

“Dude, getting caught shoplifting’s one thing
But getting caught shoplifting herpes medication
Glow-in-the-dark strawberry flavored condoms
And a book of crossword puzzles…
Man, that’s some messed-up shit.”

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RICH FERGUSON has performed nationally, and has shared the stage with Patti Smith, Wanda Coleman, Exene Cervenka, T.C. Boyle, Jerry Stahl, Bob Holman, Loudon Wainwright, Ozomatli, and many other esteemed poets and musicians. He has performed on The Tonight Show, at the Redcat Theater in Disney Hall, the New York City International Fringe Festival, the Bowery Poetry Club, South by Southwest, the Santa Cruz Poetry Festival, Stephen Elliott’s Rumpus, and with UK-based poetry collective One Taste. He is also a featured performer in the film, What About Me? (the sequel to the double Grammy-nominated film 1 Giant Leap), featuring Michael Stipe, Michael Franti, k.d. lang, Krishna Das, and others. He has been published in the LA TIMES, Opium Magazine, has been widely anthologized, spotlighted on PBS (Egg: The Art Show), and was a winner in Opium Magazine’s Literary Death Match, LA. His spoken word/music videos have been featured at poetry film festivals throughout the world. Ferguson is a Pushcart-nominated poet, and a poetry editor at The Nervous Breakdown. His poetry collection 8th & Agony has been published by L.A.’s Punk Hostage Press.

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