Not too long ago, the wonderful Ronlyn Domingue, TNB contributor and novelist, suggested I create just this sort of list after she’d enjoyed seeing Cosmo the Jack Russell terrier in Beginners, and what better time to assemble ten cinematic canine greats than the week of The Artist’s DVD release, the film that featured that other recent Oscar-season darling, Uggie. Like Cosmo and Uggie, all of the dogs on this list aren’t the main characters in their respective films but bona fide scene-stealers (just in case you’re wondering why Lassie didn’t make the cut). Now brace yourselves for a huge dose of cute:

Please explain what just happened.

I searched through my email to see which interviews I needed to do for my upcoming tour that features Crispin Hellion Glover’s Big Slide Show, Parts 1 & 2 and the films What is It? and It is Fine! EVERYTHING IS FINE.  And I decided that The Nervous Breakdown was next.

Why did you write [you] Ruined It For Everyone?

I felt there was a real need for some honesty in this era of Eat, Pray, Love. My writing takes a more sardonic approach to the world. We can’t just Band-Aid up our problems or spackle them with Julia Roberts. We have to address the mess we are in and find out who’s to blame!

 

Could you tone it down a bit? You’re scaring people.

Okay, sorry. I wrote the book because…well, I always wanted to write a book. (I’m sure most of us have at one point or another.) But it had to be in my voice…so the book is part fun facts, part humor, part sarcasm (and partly unfinished).

 

What makes you such an expert on being able to identify these ruiners?

Genetics of course. I was born with a very large hand. And attached to that hand is a very long pointy finger.

 

How did you research the book?

Well, I am proud to say that I did not step foot in one single library. I Googled everything (which is probably why I put a disclaimer in the front of the book that it might not all be factual). Aside from that, when I found something or someone that made daily life more difficult–I shrugged, and then added it to the list.

 

What’s your favorite part?

I like the ones that hit close to home for me. And I’m sure everyone will have their favorites, but a couple of mine are:

02–DeBeers–For making guys spend two months salary. (Because I did not use this rule of thumb to propose to my wife–and luckily she still loves me–I think?!)

056–Overprotective parents–For ruining children. (Hopefully I can take my own advise with my newborn daughter. So, I’ll have to get back to you with my success rate…)

051–Michael J. Fox—For causing skateboarding accidents. (I like this one because MJF is an unsuspecting ruiner. Yes he is beloved and he stars in my favorite movie BACK TO THE FUTURE. But seriously, how many kids have skinned their knees or broken bones trying to be like Marty McFly?)

 

Is there anything you’d like to brag about?

Well, I hate to boast, but since you asked…I designed this whole book. The cover, the illustrations, the typesetting and the writing—and in that order. (They think I’m a writer—but really, I am a designer at heart.)

 

What does it feel like to be a published author?

I have to say, it doesn’t suck! But, I was humbled very quickly when Christian Lander (the author of Stuff White People Like) told me before my book came out, “Make no mistake about it…you are an author–and you will have critics.”

 

What else is going on in your life?

I just had a book come out AND a baby come out…trust me, that’s plenty!

 

Is there going to be a sequel?

I just said I’m super busy, weren’t you listening? Okay, I’ll make you a deal, if you buy a copy, I’ll write another one. There, are you happy now?

 

I read through this entire interview and I feel kind of gypped…

Well, if you really feel that way, you can always email your frustration at [email protected]. Or, for complete fulfillment, you can visit youruinedit.com and tell me [who] Ruined It For You!