Dear Peg Mokrass,
I have a very large crush on a very small man. He may be a dwarf. I am not sad, or happy. I am spooked. I bump into the cats. I spray deodorant on my face. Nothing feels the way it used to, and I am much too tall. Things are messed up. Sometimes, I contemplate finding Jesus. Any advice would be welcome. -Sincerely, Lovestruck and Tall
I like little guys too! The heart follows its own Jim Jones to strange, remote islands. It tells us to drink its elixir, its Flavor Aid. LMAO x tragedy. Dude, to me? It sounds to me as though you are in deep, and this can only be good in terms of FINDING JESUS. I can help. [email protected]
When the heart leads us toward the following:
b. pillowy man with rickets
c. cosmetically enhanced contortionists
d. female Gestalt therapists
you know it’s time to ask for the the savior to make a house call! LOL x God x [email protected] He needs the cash.
When the Lord arrives, have on something sweaty and cheesy (he’s corny) and sweltering. Serve ONLY organic hymen cherries ordered from [email protected] – Spread ’em around next to your basic Costco (and this is where you really save) rhubarb candles… Say the words he wants to hear.
Poof. Little-big-man will expand if not explode inside your soul.
Sanity Liposuction & Behavioral Goddess
Meg’s new book “Damn Sure Right” 88 flash fiction stories is available here from Press 53
November 01, 2010