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Of course you can come along, Eddie. Your sleeves will come in handy on a cool day like this, but I hope you don’t mind if I cover you with this flannel. The ladies like them tight across the chest these days, and you’re too frumpy to make the grade. I suppose I’ll let you peek out a little, but try to avoid looking saggy around the collar. And should any girls happen by, I’m gonna need you to keep low.
You came to me at my mom’s insistence last Christmas, and I’ve had a hard time getting rid of you ever since. You’re somehow always there in my top drawer, offering a comfortable if dull counterpoint to whatever else I might wear. You agree with everything I own. Jesus, Eddie, try playing a little hard to get every once in a while.
I wore you once on a hiking trip to Summit Ridge. It was the perfect temperature for short sleeves, but that didn’t keep you from popping up at just the right time and somehow making me take you along. We had a great time. You didn’t complain when I used you to wipe my brow, and you even helped me twist off the cap of my Gatorade. By the end I was ready to call you my favorite, but then I went home and two brand new Ts were waiting for me at my front door, an order I’d placed and forgotten about. Come on, Eddie. It’s cotton-hybrid. You can’t expect me to pass that up.
It’s strange how easily I can forget about you. Sometimes I purposefully ignore you there in my drawer. You want me more than I want you, and it breeds resentment. I believe in my heart I should have better: a pro sports jersey, a cool button-up, a designer something-or-other from some boutique downtown. But I don’t. I have you, and on most days, Eddie, you’ll have to do.
So, my begrudged companion, it looks like it’s you and me for another trip out into the world. Do remember to keep low if the ladies come by, or if I see someone I know. Of course we’re friends, Eddie, but let’s let that be our little secret.
Wait- what was up with the two t-shirts that arrived at your door? You order your t-shirts in the mail, or are we talking about some cool/hip/vintage type ts that look good in late night diners and dive bars?
You’re asking the right questions, Joe.
One is a Rainbow (band) shirt I’d been pining for, and another just says “ABBA.”
That, my friend, is nothing short of spectacular.
Speaking of looking good in dive bars, did you see the photo of Sean Beaudoin and his Molly Hatchet shirt from the reading Monday? Holy shit. Talk about looking good in dive bars!
Um… There are photos? Where are the photos, Q? 🙁
Yes! Photos, photos!
I have three shirts just like this. Maybe I could introduce them to Eddie so that none feel alone or rejected. Let me know. Feel free to give Eddie my number.
Eddie will be thrilled, G, but I’m not going to tell him. He already likes me too much. I’ll never get rid of him!
(For some reason I can’t reply to the comment about photos. It’s weird. So I’m inappropriately replying here.)
There is one lone photo Sean put on FB. That actually might be the sum total of photos, because my brother’s camera punked. There is very little physical evidence that any of us, much like Nessie or the Abominable Snowman, exist.
Well, fresh up in the Phone Pics section of TNB is the one picture I snapped with my craptacular cell phone – of Jonathan reading.
At least Eddie’s not a marathon shirt. That’s what always comes to mind when I think of long-sleeve Ts.
You made me anxious to dig out some warm clothes next week, something I’ve not felt for a while!
Remember the long-sleeved Ts that had ski companies with the names down the arms. I’m picturing Rossignol. Man did I want one of those.
back when long-sleeved cotton was the cutting edge for ski wear…
I’m kind of in love with these stretch long underwear I get at REI. They’re top o’ the line, but I fork over the extra ten bucks for them and never regret it.
I have this same conversation with a Black Sabbath t-shirt.
Ha!
I bet your Black Sabbath T would eat my Eddie Bauer T for lunch.
HA!
Beers to ya!
Beers back atcha!
The long sleeved t-shirts are the ones that always remain at the bottom of my drawer. I never buy them, but people see my short sleeved ones and buy my the long sleeved versions. They just make me sweat too much… I don’t know why; it’s weird. But I fucking hate long sleeved t-shirts. Unwearable.
I think everyone should take the item that never leaves the bottom of their drawer and give it to their neighbor. One man’s trash, and all that.
Thanks again for reading, David
The problem is, I can never bring myself to give away something that was given to me as a gift. Well, not until a few years have passed, at least. Those stupid shirts will sit at the bottom of my drawer until the guilt leaves.
Gifts have high risks and rewards. Every once in a while–maybe once at Christmas–someone hits a home run with me. It’s always something I wouldn’t buy for myself, isn’t expensive, but I wind up dedicating my life to it.
The Eddie Bauer T was not such an item.