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I’m driving a ’57 Chevy through Brooklyn at four o’clock in the afternoon. The sun beats bullets on the asphalt that pool into mini metal ponds on the horizon. I smell coconut toasting, probably from a sweaty vendor on Flatbush, and I hear a sermon in Spanish coming from a loudspeaker on the sidewalk.
Suddenly, Al Pacino steps into the street. He’s wearing a plaid trench coat, which he opens to remove two machine guns.
He aims at me, so I gun the Chevy. It roars like a steel-toed boot.
I have no choice but to run him over.
So I do.
I can feel the snap of his neck as it smashes into the windshield, then the tha-thud thud thud of his body as it rolls over the roof of my car.
Ssssssssss.
Air deflates somewhere.
I look back. He’s dead. So I drive off.
I go home and burn my robe.
It’s plaid.
I wake up crying. Diane Keaton is on my mind. She loved him so.
Did he love her?
I want to know.
So I go back to sleep.
Comment by Irene Zion (Lenore’s Mom)
2009-07-09 10:30:53
Ducky,
Don’t fret! Al Pacino is still alive and well and I’m sure that Diane Keaton is fine too.
If you still have that car, you can probably sell it for a LOT of money.
That’s not a dream. It’s a nightmare.
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 08:02:20
Oh, how I wish my nightmares were that easy.
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Comment by David Breithaupt
2009-07-09 11:24:54
I had that dream once. Diane jilted him.
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 08:02:44
Did she?
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Comment by Simon Smithson
2009-07-09 12:41:37
Interesting fact: Michael Keaton named himself (stage-name-wise) after Diane Keaton, as there was already an actor out there with his real name: Michael Douglas.
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 08:03:37
Thanks! I love this kind of trivia.
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Comment by Irene Zion (Lenore’s Mom)
2009-07-09 13:28:36
Simon!
You are SO smart!
When are you arriving for the bad-ass duel?
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Comment by Simon Smithson
2009-07-09 14:26:06
Well, yes, that’s undeniable. Also, I used to work for an entertainment company, and I get bored quite easily. Thankfully, IMDB is always there.
I don’t know! The smouldering embers of my desire to be back in America have been fanned into a flame lately. But it’s going to take some doing.
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Comment by norm Rock
2009-07-09 17:15:22
I once dreamed that a hamburger was eating me!!
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 08:04:31
Sounds like the makings of a future TNB post.
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Comment by oksana marafioti
2009-07-09 17:52:04
Sweet!
I met Al Pacino on the set of Ocean’s 13. He was very polite, kind of short, and was not wearing plaid. The next time I come across Al, I’ll make sure to ask him about those machine guns.
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 08:01:18
Oh, I hope I never meet him. I actually adore the man and want to keep it that way. I’d never want anything to ruin my feelings about the movie “Scarecrow.” Or “Dog Day Afternoon.”
I’ve met a few of these kind – celebs – whatever – they usually disappoint and then I can’t separate them from their work.
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Comment by D.R. Haney
2009-07-10 21:15:12
I met Pacino twice, through Sully Boyar, who played the bank manager in Dog Day Afternoon. I blogged about it here at TNB in a piece that was mostly about Norman Mailer.
I somehow see this dream as having been inspired by Scarface, so the possible inclusion of Diane Keaton was, for me, like a mixing of metaphors.
(Comments wont nest below this level)
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Comment by David S. Wills
2009-07-09 19:00:08
That’s a really nice opening paragraph!
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 07:58:21
Thanks. They don’t come easy. It probably began as four pages.
The craft is not in writing; it’s in editing.
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Comment by John Box
2009-07-09 19:48:33
Excellente! That’s Spanish for ‘nice fuckin’ story, dude!’
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 07:56:44
Gracias amigo!
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Comment by Kimberly M. Wetherell
2009-07-09 22:50:41
The car is your career (bitchin’ and you are driving)
Pacino represents all those bastards in your way (talented though they may be)
The trench coat/robe is the pretense we hate to don (but have to)
Diane Keaton is ice cream (delicious and wonderful – who doesn’t want more of both?)
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Comment by Ducky
2009-07-10 07:56:11
I love this analysis. Thank you Dr. Wetherell. I’ll have to pay you in hamburgers later.
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Comment by N.L. Belardes
2009-07-10 14:23:59
I’ve never had a dream half this cool, Rubber Ducky. That is some badass shit!! OK, I’m going to put “Heat” on right now!