5 Really, Really Lame Jokes About American ModernistsBy Nathan Pensky
January 12, 2011
Q: What do you get when you take an American expatriate living in Paris and cross him with a suicidal rodent?
A: Ernest Lemmingway
Q: What’s the difference between Bertrand Russell, Mary Shelley, and Alice B. Toklas?
A: One debated Wittgenstein, one created Frankenstein, and one a-bedded Gertrude Stein.
Woman #1: Why did Zelda Fitzgerald cross the road?
Woman #2: To “F” Scott Fitzgerald.
Woman #1: I wouldn’t “F” Scott Fitzgerald, but I Sherwood Anderson.
Erskine Caldwell who?
Erskine called while you were in the bathroom, and you never called him back.
Faulkner? I barely know ‘er!
I wouldn’t “F” Scott Fitzgerald, but I Sherwood Anderson. bwahahahah
You’re a goddamm genius. A really, really nerdy genius.
I’m not using the word nerd disparagingly either…
Yup, I agree with Gloria about the Sherwood Anderson one.
Great literary groaners, Nathan!
Thank you, Nathan. I am going to use “Faulkner? I barely know ‘er!” as inappropriately and often as possible, if that’s okay with you. (:
this is brilliant. definitely golf clap worthy.
Wonderful. I will annoy my wife with them immediately.
I’ve always wanted to write about a fictional writer/rock star named Lemmy Hemingway.
A ha ha ha ha ha…
You, sir, should be crowned the King of Thursday.
I love lame jokes.
If only Gertrude Stein had had a penis, then it could have been fellated…
You know, I almost said “fellated” on that one, Darian, but then didn’t.
Ha –you weren’t kidding Nathan!
[too afraid to make up a joke concerning Gertrude Stein and John Updike]
Well played, Nathan.
Ha, I think I know what you’re talking about, Greg! I totally forgot about that.
I look forward to your posts! Thanks for the laugh.